I’m Going To Dyer You Up The Dyer

I recently had the following conversation with #1GF!…

#1GF!: [Underappreciated Worker] just told me that he’s thinking of pulling a Dyer right now. He’s going to make “Dyer” a verb like “did you hear about [co-worker who quit]? He just Dyered yesterday.”
Me: Awe. Some.
#1GF!: It made me laugh.
Me: It’s the opposite of getting Dooced.
#1GF!: Why’s that?
Me: To get Dooced is to get fired for your blog. To Dyer is to suddenly quit for your blog.
#1GF!: Here’s a quote: “Well, now I’m going to go home…drink beer, and dyer all over my bathroom floor”
Me: Wait, what?
#1GF!: He used it as a verb.
Me: Wait, now “dyer” means “throw up”?
#1GF!: He just said that he wanted you to know that using it just made him feel better.
Me: Does “dyer” mean “suddenly quit” or “throw up”?
#1GF!: Quit at first, then throw up.
Me: Hold on now. You can’t just randomly throw a word around and have it mean anything you want. English doesn’t work like that. You can’t say things like “It’s Dyer to Dyer a Dyer, To Dyer a Dyer that’s right on Dyer. It’s Dyer…it’s Dyer (Dyer) Dyer (Dyer)”. This isn’t the f’ing smurfs.

The title, “I’m going to help you up the stairs”, was changed to illustrate potential problems with this new linguistic proposal.

6 thoughts on “I’m Going To Dyer You Up The Dyer

  1. when i was in college, i had a lab partner that was really creepy. so creepy that i told him i couldn’t tell him where i lived b/c i was in the witness protection program. (did he fall for that? probably not. did he get the hint?…yes.) anyway, eventually his name became synonymous with vomiting. “that makes me want to Bill.” usually “bill” was emphasized with some kind of vomiting sound as it was pronounced.

  2. Aren’t there *other* people who should also get credit for quitting their jobs as well? Shouldn’t it *really* be like the Dyer-Jensen? Or the Dysen? Or the Jener. Something like that. Hmm?

    Hey, Llama, you know how about a little tip, you know, for the effort. And he said to me, oh, there will be no tip. But on your death bed you will receive total consciousness.

    So, I got that going for me.

  3. I think if you are the one who made up the word, you have the right to define it any way you want. When you aren’t thinking clearly, sometimes you need a word that can be ambiguous just to make your point…even if nobody else understands. It helps, especially for the occupationally frustrated.

  4. Kubb King: You didn’t make up the word, you simply abducted it for your own evil plans, so…

    And sure, we can call quitting pulling a Dysen. And we can call throwing up a bill. And we can use made up words like frak and smurf, *but* the real question is, did anyone catch the Run DMC reference?

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