I recently had the following conversation with #1GF!…
#1GF!: [Underappreciated Worker] just told me that he’s thinking of pulling a Dyer right now. He’s going to make “Dyer” a verb like “did you hear about [co-worker who quit]? He just Dyered yesterday.”
Me: Awe. Some.
#1GF!: It made me laugh.
Me: It’s the opposite of getting Dooced.
#1GF!: Why’s that?
Me: To get Dooced is to get fired for your blog. To Dyer is to suddenly quit for your blog.
#1GF!: Here’s a quote: “Well, now I’m going to go home…drink beer, and dyer all over my bathroom floor”
Me: Wait, what?
#1GF!: He used it as a verb.
Me: Wait, now “dyer” means “throw up”?
#1GF!: He just said that he wanted you to know that using it just made him feel better.
Me: Does “dyer” mean “suddenly quit” or “throw up”?
#1GF!: Quit at first, then throw up.
Me: Hold on now. You can’t just randomly throw a word around and have it mean anything you want. English doesn’t work like that. You can’t say things like “It’s Dyer to Dyer a Dyer, To Dyer a Dyer that’s right on Dyer. It’s Dyer…it’s Dyer (Dyer) Dyer (Dyer)”. This isn’t the f’ing smurfs.
The title, “I’m going to help you up the stairs”, was changed to illustrate potential problems with this new linguistic proposal.