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6:12 AM
Got up and made the coffee. Had to dump my cereal because the milk I bought at the rich town supermarket went bad 5 days early. Shook my fist at the rich elite and their expiring milk and did some pushups to calm down. Decided to eat cottage cheese ad canned peaches because I had forgotten how gross it was. Checked my list of crap to do. Responded to #1GF!’s suggestion of relaxing with something like, “Relaxing is a reward for people who work. For people who don’t work, there’s really no need.” Got #1GF! out the door to work.
10:30 AM
Checked some e-mail accounts that I’ve been neglecting. Ran a couple of miles. Went for a walk to cool down. Looked at my reflection in a window and thought my haircut made me look like an off-duty cop. Walked by the mini golf course, which I think used to be a Paragon Park ride called the “Congo Cruise”. Walked by the carosel and wanted to paint it. Thought the same about the Clock tower. Found the old track for the old Turnpike cars ride (what it looks like now) and wondered why no one has turned it into a skate park or something. Went home, ate an apple, backed up my e-mail, and had ham sandwich.
1:30 PM
Went to the mall to find some sunglasses that didn’t make me look like I was trying to attract a dude or fuck someone’s teenage daughter. Wandered into Old Navy and bought some cargo shorts. Went into Walmart, because I think that’s where unemployed people are supposed to go. Tried on 50 pairs of $5 sunglasses and left empty handed. Wished that they had NASCAR branded glasses just so I could wear them to tomorrow’s wedding. They didn’t, so I left. Went to find some books for the kids, and felt like I must look like some child kidnapper wandering aimlessly around the children’s section trying to find friggin’ Disney Books. Had to ask and was led to a shelf full of Disney branded garbage. Gave up and wandered back into my comfort section, seeking out a Python book. It didn’t exist. Started getting a headache and decided to go look for sunglasses again. Found three pairs that I liked at K-Holes, but figured $13 was too much to pay for something that I’m bound to break or lose in the next three days. Bought a wedding card. Went to the drugstore and somehow showed up on the one day a year that the drugstore doesn’t have sunglasses. Thought about going back into K-Holes. Said “fuck it” and gave up.
3:30 PM
Got home. Tracked my cell phone shipment. When the status suddenly changed to “delivered” five minutes after I got home, I almost called to complain. Instead, I went downstairs to check the mail box and found the package tucked under the bushes. Read the phone documentation and plugged it in to charge. Went to learn some Python in the hopes that the phone number would magically present itself to me after charging. Felt like an old man.
7 PM
Loaded Lightening the Thunderbird calendar application and started adding in people’s birthdays. Watched Attack of the Show. Started playing with all the features of my $1 phone. Had to call to change the area code because 339 isn’t in Massachusetts. Told the lady that I’d send it back before paying a $36 charge for a number they assigned me outside my area code. Got the number changed to something I liked for free. Called #1GF! and determined that the phone has good range at three feet. Messed with it some more. Went to bed.
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June 8th, 2007 at 1:21 pm
“Responded to #1GF!’s suggestion of relaxing with something like, “Relaxing is a reward for people who work. For people who don’t work, there’s really no need.” Got #1GF! out the door to work.”
Nice. Virtual high five to #1GF!
And Brian is right, you do suck as a bum.
June 8th, 2007 at 1:24 pm
Ooops. I recall my virtual high five to #1GF. Thought it was her who said it. My bad.
Gah. I suck as a commentator.
June 8th, 2007 at 1:41 pm
I hope this becomes a book…I’d buy that book.
June 8th, 2007 at 3:42 pm
There should be pictures or illustrations with this. It’s pretty awesome. And I kind of agree with you. I don’t like relaxing.
June 8th, 2007 at 3:52 pm
Ummm….It isn’t too late to come back.
June 8th, 2007 at 4:00 pm
It’s interesting to see how one who is unemployed spends their day – especially when you actually spend it doing stuff, not just laying around the house.
It really makes me want to become more active. Since I work 2nd shift, I feel like the daytime should be productive, however I’m usually too tired to do anything and spend it asleep when my 1 year old is asleep as well, or wrangling him and trying not to tire myself out before work.
Maybe that’s a clue that I need to eat right and exercise.
And I second what Michelle said, I’d buy the book too.
June 8th, 2007 at 4:34 pm
cargo shorts?
June 9th, 2007 at 9:14 am
Did you get the better rate at the bank? If not, do you think going back after the haircut would help? Not that I would know anything about how haircuts and banks go together… I don’t think NASCAR shades and a water pistol would do you much better, but since you are now a bum, should bank robbery cross your mind, at least you’ve got a fast getaway car.
I was in a 339 cell block, I mean cell phone, for a while, but it was Cingular and only worked on the highway to and from the office. And the-middle-of-nowhere Colorado. They said it was the same area as 781, but they ran out of numbers so they made that area code up too. I said shut this $40/month pocket watch off please and they still tried to sell me another plan. Hope you went with Verizon.
-d—
June 11th, 2007 at 2:42 pm
I did bump my rate up 132 basis points, and yes, I wear cargo shorts. They have big pockets for storing cans that won’t fit in my shopping cart.
I think I’m way more active than when I was working because I’m not run down by the grind. No one is forcing me to do anything, making chores less chore like. I completely understand coming home and sitting on the couch to unwind. But when there’s nothing to really unwind from, there’s no real need.
(And thanks for the two book pre-orders!)