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Know what my favorite thing about telling people that I quit my job is? It’s the ideas that people feel obligated to throw at me. They usually start with “You know what you should do…”
It’s almost as if they forget that I resigned under good circumstances and am not itching to jump into another job just to pay the bills. Although I may have smiled politely while these were thrown out, I’m have no intention of:
working for Geek Squad,
working at Subway,
working in the cafeteria making sandwiches for my former co-workers,
coming back as everyone’s boss,
being a Baywatch-style lifeguard,
buying a bike-driven ice cream cart,
moving to Sweden,
being a teacher,
becoming a professional gamer,
shearing sheep,
babysitting,
“volunteering with old people”,
or shitting statues that look like Richard Nixon.
I also don’t think that MadTV is in the habit of hiring people just because they can entertain co-workers, although I think that the suggestion that I could just call them up has been my favorite so far.
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May 29th, 2007 at 6:28 pm
hm, it’s too bad; we really do need some sheep shearers here in ireland; there’s apparently a deficit.
May 29th, 2007 at 6:33 pm
In my experience, the “you know what you should do?” phrase translates to “you know what I would do if I had the balls to do what you just did?”
Most people are not trying to help you find a new career, they are trying to live vicariously through you. (no offense to any of my co-workers and they’re wonderful suggestions)
May 29th, 2007 at 6:51 pm
It’s kinda like that whole “What would you do with a million dollars?” question.
The obvious answer is “I’ll tell ya what I’d do man… two chicks at the same time”, however, nobody can tell you what you should really do with your million dollars.
And really, quitting your job and feeling good about it has to be almost the equivalent of a million dollars - even if you’re not earning money while doing it - unless you know a secret on how to earn money by not working.
May 30th, 2007 at 12:45 am
buy the wolly theater and turn it into a cinema pub. my second vote is for the pedal power ice cream cart. finally, you can be my unpaid web designer.
May 30th, 2007 at 8:27 am
Jon forgot “Restart Death Metal Band”
May 30th, 2007 at 11:23 am
First, I’d remove all the hair from my body so I looked like that guy in that movie Powder. Either a bottle of Nair or a short quick burst of flame applied to my skin…just enough to remove the hair, but not enough to hurt the skin. Eye lashes can stay. I’d ask my wife to help with the hard places.
Second, I’d go to the emergency room with a non-specific ailment such as Ferris. Clammy hands, stomach ache. Then watch the doctors go as there must me something more serious wrong with me. Which is true, but it aint physical.
Third, I’d have them lie me on a metal table and stick me with a bunch of needles which would rebuild my muscles. I’d ask “Why do my eyes hurt?” and Morpheus would tell me its because I never used them.
May 30th, 2007 at 5:58 pm
Kerry: Ireland has become a technology center, which pays slightly better than the sheep shearing business. As US companies outsource to India and China more, the tide should turn and equalize the market
Peter: Those nutless bastards are only looking out for themselves (no offense to any of my co-workers)??
N0ia: This isn’t so bad, huh? Makin’ bucks, gettin’ exercise, working outside? Fuckin’ A.
Yo Sis: I don’t think I’ll have time, as I am already working on a jump to conclusions mat.
KFC: REstart death metal band? Like SLEDGEBREAKER isn’t already legendary in Scandinavia?
JJMM. I will send the Nebuchadnezzar back for you. Sit tight.
May 31st, 2007 at 11:14 am
I won’t tell you “what you should do” but can I instead offer a belated “congratulations?” Leaving a job, most of the time, can be a heady, emotionally freeing experience, filled with new possibilities! Hope you enjoy it.