Dear young lady,
As cute as you thought that plaid mini skirt and high-heeled black boots looked when you put them on this morning, they might not have been the best choice for corporate work wear. Unless you are Brittney Spears or work at an establishment where most of the work is done around a pole, people are just not going to take you seriously. Most likely, they’re going to spend most of the time that you’re talking concerned with how many dudes you plan on squeezing into your lunch time gang bang.

Dear mustache man,
As cool as you thought that beret looked when you walked out of the house this morning, it might not have been the best choice for wearing to work. Unless you are in the special forces or work at the Paris Casino in Las Vegas, people are just not going to take you seriously. Most likely they’re going to spend the time you’re talking concerned with how many dudes you plan on squeezing into your lunch time gang bang.

(I don’t know how I have the audacity to critique other people’s fashion choices when my 4 month old, insan-o beard could easily net me $50 a day panhandling at the train station.)

Posted in Beards