Comments on: Fire Prevention Week: Fuck Candles

By: Jon

Jon — Wed, 19 Oct 2005 21:23:54 +0000

Although that’s hot, Vivian, I’m going to suggest that you stay away from churches and vigils. People at those things have poor senses of humor about candle humpers and you’ll probably just end up burned by pure volume.

Anyway… I bought the Mr. T. bank at a yard sale from a guy who wanted $.50 for it, but then noticed it had no plug to keep in the money so he knocked it down to a quarter. As I thought it was the coolest thing that I had ever seen for less than a dollar, I argued to give him the full $.50. I think I drove with it on my dash all day, shaking it at people and talking in a Mr. T. like voice until everyone wanted me dead. When I had a house, it sat in a lighted case built into the wall guarding the stairs (reserved for madonnas, I think). Now, it sits up in the loft pitying my living room. UNGH.

You should know that yours are the only comments that get hung up in Comment moderation limbo… What does WordPress know that I dont?

By: Vivian

Vivian — Wed, 19 Oct 2005 13:34:45 +0000

Wow, that’s tragic and cool at the same time. I shall be fucking all the unattended candles I can find from now on. I don’t even wanna know why you have a Mr. T head.

By: Jon

Jon — Tue, 18 Oct 2005 10:20:39 +0000

Honestly, I’ve never felt as free as in the hour after that fire. I can remember walking around a supermarket owning nothing but a car, a Mr. T. head and the smokey clothes on my back. Then, I bought a toothbrush and it all fell apart.

By: ap

ap — Mon, 17 Oct 2005 12:46:26 +0000

Holy shit, that is so unbelievably fucking awful. How did you just pick up and go on? BTW – that is a great picture with the clock.

By: Ouch

Ouch — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 20:33:18 +0000

Unless you’re cookin’ some meat stay away from fire kids. Were you at least able to sell the clock as a Dali?

By: Sarah

Sarah — Fri, 14 Oct 2005 00:33:55 +0000

OH MY GOD!!

By: Jon

Jon — Thu, 13 Oct 2005 23:17:51 +0000

My reaction:

My street was blocked off with fire hoses that night, and I had to run 2 blocks full sprint thinking that the neighbor’s kids or the old people next door might be in trouble. When I pushed through the crowd watching, all I could say was, “That’s my fucking house.”

When the firemen finally said it was safe enough to go in to grab a few valuables before it got boarded up, I came out with an address book and a Mr. T bank and said “Well, I think that’s it.”

The Mr. T. head watches over my living room to this day.

By: MOM

MOM — Thu, 13 Oct 2005 13:32:52 +0000

So sad to relive that terrible time. Even I agree #$@& unattended candles!

By: JR

JR — Thu, 13 Oct 2005 08:12:53 +0000

HOLY SHIT! Man! I feel for ya! If that ever happened to me… I just don’t know how I would react. Losing the records would have been devastating.

So I share your view… FUCK UNATTENDED CANDLES!