It’s been a while, but I finally broke down and bought a batch.

• Probot - Probot (metal): Dave Grohl (Nirvana, Foo Fighters) put together a long awaited album where each song was recorded with some of the biggest names in heavy metal from the 1980’s. There are tracks featuring Lemmy from Motorhead, King Diamond, and even a hidden, secret bonus track from Jack Black. On paper, this album is phenomenal. Unfortunately, no matter how good I wanted it to be, it’s a solid waste of $10. C.
• XZibit - Weapons of Mass Destruction (rap): X to the Z pimps rides well enough to get his own show on the MTV. X to the Z raps well enough makes middle age white guys unconsciously do stupid things like “raise the roof” in broad daylight when they drive in their cars. This album is just raw enough to avoid sounding like Will Smith, while being produced well enough to make you forget that dancing and driving don’t mix. So, crank it like a gangster in your pimp mobile, biotch. Bling? Bling? A-
• Lamb of God - As the Palaces Burn (death metal): First, for the uninitiated, you’re probably asking yourselves, “What the hell is death metal?” Ok. Do a fake burp. No one’s looking, so humor me. Do it. I’ll wait. Nice one. Ok. Next, fake burp a whole word like the kid in fifth grade who could burp his name. Just friggin’ do it. Perfect. You have just completed “Death metal vocals 101.” Now, imagine that type of vocals over the musical portion of best 80’s thrash metal that you can imagine. You are now imagining Death Metal. Like opera, death metal was one of the hardest musical forms for me to get used to, but it has become some of my favorite music. Why? It’s really, really complex. Couple that with the fact that I listen to the tone and rhythm of vocals more than the lyrical focal point of a song, and we get a big heart with “death metal + Jon, TLA, 4-eva” written in it. And “As the Palaces Burn” is a really awesome example of the genre. B+
• Lamb of God - Ashes of the Wake (death metal): I liked “As the palaces burn” so much that I went back to the store and bought this album 2 days later. Although it’s not as good as “As the Palaces Burn,” it’s a head bangin’ good time. B
• The Shins - Oh, Inverted world (pop): In Garden State, the main character was told that the Shins would change his life. I can’t say that the album is life changing, but I do find it to be mood altering. I find myself becoming very introspective and calm after sitting through the Shins. The best way that I can describe their sound would be to say that they sound like the softer side of early Kinks. No, not that “knock down the pally” shit. The old stuff. B+
• Gwen Stefani - Love, Angel, Music, Baby (pop): Unfortunately, I heard someone on the radio say that this was an album that you love to hate. They said it was a guilty pleasure for the rock fan, and like a complete moron, I bought it hook, line, and sinker. Unfortunately for me and my wallet, it’s not a guilty pleasure: It’s a crappy pop album. There are a couple of catchy tunes on there, but this is generally music for teenage girls, and boys who want to be them. C-

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